On My 15th Birthday. :)

December 6, 2009 at 3:11 pm (Love) (, , )

On My 15th Birthday

My birthday has arrived,

I’m 1 year closer to my death;

Getting older again

I don’t feel loved.

What’s with me now?

I’ve got no presents,

Nor celebration

I don’t feel loved

Mom woke me up, asking me

Not to invite too many friends;

Giving me chores to do

I don’t feel loved

I went out to get my towel; dad’s sitting

And sipping a cup of espresso

He ignored me as if I don’t exist,

I don’t feel loved

Bro’s in front of the computer

Busy typing and playing

He never greeted me

I don’t feel loved.

I checked my phone’s inbox,

And guess what,

Some greeted me, but still

I don’t feel loved.

This day was a crap

I’m all alone inside my room

Jotting this down, a gift for myself

I don’t feel loved.

This day is my 15th birthday

And hey, I’m crying as I lay

In my bed; the world betrayed me

Making everyone hate me

I don’t feel loved.


* * * *

So I just turned 15. Yiz. That’s true. I’m 1 year closer to my death. Haha.

I made a poem for myself…just some random thoughts up on my brain. Made out of hatred? Guess so.

I don’t want to elaborate anything. The poem says everything that happened this morning. :)

* * * *

I had a very nice and happy birthday, even though Juliene and Tam are the only guests of my so-called celebration. I had fun with them. The best day, as I call it. :)

I’m so happy that they come…especially when we talked as if there’s no tomorrow. Had some bonding time with them… :)

And Juliene, my dearest Boo…gave me a present [ a pouch, book, headband and a letter. ] ! Gee. I can’t help but feel so grateful for those gifts…but I won’t even care if she didn’t give me apresent, her presence made it so. :)

One of my mom’s friend gave me Nike Bag. I appreciate it. :)

* * * *

Gee. I can’t explain it. Too much happiness may lead to lunacy. :)

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I Don’t Need A Crap. :P

December 6, 2009 at 3:03 pm (Love) (, , , )

Oh yeah. It’s damn boring. So boring. I’ve got nothing to do. I don’t even want to read a book or sleep, or even play YoVille. Ratatatatata….


* * * *

I’ve realized something lately…I’ve been 1 year and 3 months single. No boyfriend at all. But I almost have one, but I guess we’re not destined to be together. [ Naks. ]

1 year and 3 months of loneliness…of flirting…but not moving on. Ang tatag ko kasi nakayanan kong wag magBF ng ganun katagal. I never expected that to be these long. That only means that I don’t need a piece of crap in my life. And honestly, I can’t see myself having some romantic thingy with a guy. I just can’t imagine myself displaying some affection on public. That sucks! :-&

So about that almost relationship–gee! I really wanna forget that person but I just can’t. I don’t want he gave me to make me love him this much. But…but…but, I’m getting over him. Oh yes. I have realized that he’s so weak to be my owner [ FFS? ] . I don’t that stupud crap in my life. DUH! Dun sya sa magling nyang Gf na wala na atang ibang ginawa kundi tingnan ako ng masama at etcetera. Magsama sila. They’re not my lost. As if!

The hell I care about them. And yes baby, I’d laugh my lungs out if they broke up. Tha f*ck! They suck! As in!

I don’t give a shiit. :) )

* * * *

I wanna sleep but my eyes still want to see some action. My imagination runs wild. :) )

GEE!

Good night fellas. :P

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I miss …

November 25, 2009 at 12:12 pm (Cruel, Love) (, , , )

I miss you!

I miss you!

I miss you!

* * * *

Ok. Matagal-tagal na din since nung huli akong nagblog. Maybe a month ago. I don’t know. Thank God I have time to create one…again!

* * * *

So I’m missing someone now. Seriously. I don’t know why but I just miss him. His care, his possessiveness, the way he texts me, his voice whenever were talking on the phone, his touch, and everything. In short, I miss HIM, whoever he is.

I know I don’t have the right to miss him but what else can I do? I feel so stupid whenevr I pretend that I don’t miss him and etcetera. I feel so hypocrite whenever I tell others that I’m not in love with him, even if I am really in love with him, as in so much in love with him!

What did he give to me to make me love him this much? I don’t know, but all I can remember is…he “loved” me more than I loved him, as what he said. Should I believe in him or not?

I don’t even see myself loving other man aside from him. Do I want to spend my life with him? Definitely YES. Well, how I wish I can.

I still wonder why we ended so fast? Is it me…or is it his fault, his shortcoming? Haay…

Until when am I going to hide this feelings of mine? I’m wondering…

* * * *

I miss you

&&

I LOVE YOU! :(

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You’re so FUNNY. :)

October 20, 2009 at 11:39 am (Love) (, , , )

HAHA! Bakit ganun? Lahat na lang ng mapupuntahan kong profile, sa tuwing mababasa ko yung “who i want to meet” section ng profile nila…ganito palaging nakalagay:
I MET HIM/HER NA.
Kung hindi ganyan…ganito…
Mabait, Gwapo/Maganda, and etc.
Parang ewan lang. HAHA! Ewan ko. Ganito lang siguro reaksyon ko kasi…wala akong love life at sila meron. HAHA! Pero di ako naiinggit. Wala naman kasi dapat ikainggit. Di ko trip mga jowa niyo.
* * * *
Ayun. HAHA! Panalo ka talaga. Lakas ng trip mo magselos. Gusto mo IYO na LAHAT eh. Sige. Iyo na. Angkinin mo na…BUONG MUNDO. HAHA! Good luck naman sayo. Swerte mo naman pag nagawa mo yun. :) )
Pero eto na talaga. Happy BIRTHDAY at MONTHSARY sa mga nagdidiwang dyan ngayon eh noh. Very good din yan eh noh. :) )
* * * *
Bakit kaya ganun? Palagi niya akong PINAGSESELOSAN. :) )
Good luck naman sa kin, Masyado daw kasi akong MAHAL ni GOD kaya ganun siya. HAHA! Oye naman.

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Depressed. :|

October 16, 2009 at 12:30 pm (Cruel, Love) (, , , )

I hate this. I don’t like this. No. I never wanted this! I don’t know what went wrong but I know I made a HUGE mistake.

I can’t even take it. I can’t.

This thing was only that so-called “GAGUHAN”. I hate it. Of all, why me?

And I think I just concluded such theory that MEN are ALL the SAME. They have nothing to do with us, girls, who give almost everythin just to be with them. Call it “The Risk Taking.”

Grabeicious talaga.

I don’t know why he did that. He’s such a LIAR. Everything he said were lies. It made me feel so dumb.

And I knew it, it’ll only be ok at first…and will worsen as time goes by. It was like breaking my heart into pieces. He crumpled and teared it as if it was a scratch paper. It hurts, I know. It really does. But what else can I do. What’s done is done, I have nothing to do with it. It’s over. So over.

I feel so stupid.

It felt so good then so bad. It felt so right then so wrong. It felt like heaven then like hell.

Men. I want to forget about it. This thing depresses me. I HATE IT!

You damn ass#ole. Wait for my vengeance. I’ll promise you that you’ll never forget that! ,,!,,

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